Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement to make:
This is an indisputable fact. The year 2020 has been a disaster. Several, in fact. And there’s still plenty of 2020 left. I’m not telling you something you don’t already know. Something you also probably know is that when the chips are down, alcohol sales go up. What you may not know is that this rise in the purchase and consumption of libations, while pathetic and distasteful most other months of the year, is completely appropriate for the month of September–the traditional month of Oktoberfest! [Mike’s note: Everyone knows this, too.]
While we all at the Fictosphere are teetotalers and thus shun drink like it’s some sort of filth from the deepest depths of Hell itself [Mike’s note: This is patently untrue.], that doesn’t mean that we don’t like to celebrate in other ways. Observe: KONGTOBERFEST!
Yes, dear readers, it’s time to raise your steins to the greatest King of them all: Kong, the 8th Wonder of the world! Drown your 2020 sorrows with us all throughout the month of September as we discuss the original giant ape’s filmography. From classic masterpieces and lost treasures to unmade curiosities and modern interpretations, if you love Kong, you’ll find something to enjoy at the Fictosphere in the month of September.
“But Randall,” you ask, “didn’t you just do KaiJune? And KaiSummer? Why wasn’t Kong part of that event?”
“No,” is my reply. Trevor Thomson and Mike Podgor did those. I did nothing but succumb to crippling COVID-induced depression and repost something I’d posted before. In answer to your second (third, technically) query, Kong is like Godzilla in that both really deserve their own months. While I’m sure we’ll have a Godzilla event in the future, Kongtoberfest is for Kong and Kong alone. Well, except for when Kong fights other monsters–but, like, shut up.
Anyway, please be sure to check back regularly, as Kong-related updates will be happening all throughout the month of September! We’re thinking at least three articles a week right now, but if that changes, we’ll just edit this post with new information and erase what I just said like it never happened.
NEXT: King Kong (1933)